Tips For Having More Friends

Did you know that the key to happiness lies in being surrounded by good people ? In this age of social networks and technology, it seems that we are friends from all over the world … However, in reality, true friendships are very rare. In this article we will give you some tips to have more (real) friends.

Why do I have few friends?

Maybe when you were younger and in high school you had a great group of friends. However, as  time went by, that circle was closing more and more and now you have realized that you only “have left” a handful of friends with whom you talk more often.

When it’s time to celebrate your birthday or your wedding and you want to make the guest list it is probably shorter than at 15 or 20 years. Why? Well, because life takes us on different paths and we stop being so in contact with many people.

Even in today’s times when the internet connects us with people on the other side of the planet in a matter of seconds, we can experience that feeling that we need to have more friends.

Making new friends is not an easy task. You should know that from the beginning. It is not to take away your illusion, but to let you know that it takes time.

Lack of continuity in relationships is the first reason for lack of friends. You need to be in touch all the time. With a message every birthday or for the holidays is not enough. Think of friendship as a beautiful plant: the more you take care of it, the more likely it will flourish and remain healthy and beautiful over time.

Keys to having more friends

We start with the steps or changes you should make to have more friends. These tips can also help you not lose friendships that you have already made.

1. Put aside your insecurities

One of the causes of not making or keeping friends is because we believe that we are not deserving of such friendships. Why would he be interested in me? What can I give him in return? , I have a boring life so that you like my company …

Believe it or not, you have many things to offer someone. To start your love and fidelity. That’s already a lot! Do not be shy. Don’t avoid social contact. Don’t think they will reject you. You have many positive qualities, knowledge, experiences and thoughts that can bring you closer to people.

To have more friends, you don’t have to be a millionaire, dress fashionable, drive a late-model car, or be a celebrity.

2. Stay in touch

Proximity is essential to maintain friendships and, of course, to make new ones. You should avoid being tedious or forcing the other to stay.

• Take advantage of the fact that new technologies shorten distances, but do not abuse messages or calls.
• Do your best to come face to face with that person.

• Take the time for a dinner or a few drinks every now and then. It is the best way to get to know each other more and forge an unbreakable bond.

3. Look for people with interests or tastes in common

You can join a club, organization, forum or group in which people with the same interests as you participate. This will facilitate a first contact, as well as the flow of conversation.

If you like gardening, take a garden course; If you love music, take singing or instrument classes; study a language; play sports, go to church or volunteer… This way you can be surrounded by people who, at least, have something in common with you.

4. Don’t judge

Finding perfect friends is impossible, because we all make mistakes. Don’t try to make your relationships exceptional. There will be good times and bad times.

If you are introduced to someone you might not like at first glance … give it a try! It may surprise you and become someone very important to you. Many times “opposites attract”. Your personality can be the opposite of the other’s. But maybe that will help you to complement each other and make an invincible duo.

5. Express your feelings

It is useless if you always make yourself strong in front of others. That way you won’t have any more friends. Nor does it mean that in the first meeting you tell him intimacies or important things.

However, talking about feelings or expressing opinions can be a great way to start a friendship relationship. How? Through trust and honesty.

6. Be authentic

In relation to the previous point, we can also recommend that you do not try to be someone you are not. The masks and performances only serve to break relationships.

• If your intention is to forge lasting and true friendships you have to be authentic, sincere and yourself. Do not imitate, do not invent anything, or sooner or later they will discover you and they will not want to stay by your side.

• In order to win a friendship, you must first work on your qualities and bring them to light when appropriate.
• Do not be ashamed of your tastes, your ideas or your points of view.

7. Start the conversation

You can say something superficial like what beautiful shoes you have, how well they fit you and today is a beautiful summer day, right?

A good way to keep the conversation going is to take an interest in the other person (without sounding too inquisitive or intrusive). Remember that people like to talk about themselves and it is always easy for them.

Another option is to offer your help (for example, if you are in a meeting ask if the organizer needs drinks brought to the table or chairs arranged).

Lee: Wu wei, solve problems without forcing

8. Organize your schedule

To have more friends you must be available. This means that “no time” excuses are not allowed.

Of course, you should not give up work or your personal space, nor do you have to put everything aside to be with others, but you should be organized enough to give space to your new friends with some frequency.

As you can see, to make more friends you have to be willing to interact with other people, overcome your own limitations -in terms of socialization-, open up, trust, contribute and let them contribute to you, as well as be spontaneous and enjoy things more simple in the company of those we have chosen to have a good time.